Mood in suspense....... *if only you would understand*

* A quiet person has more emotional thoughts than anyone else*

* She needs more attention and support than any others*

* She is gasping for breath on some days*

* A sense of her struggling*

* Will u be there for her?*

*Do you understand?*

Feelin stressed/.... feeling off... feeling uneasy..... feeling weird...

Tml is my 1st paper, yet i am still stoning right in front of my comp at this hour. WHY? I am in doubt.... Crap!!! Having no idea of what am i tinkin.. having no idea of what should be done... Havin no idea of this this tat tat.....

Where is my heart? Drifting to where?? Perhaps Singapore River to join my "sis" there....

Sometimes, you ought to know where should you be? If you were able to avoid somethin, jz avoid.. The lesser you know, in perhaps the better it would be. It doesnt mean that offering your help repeatedly would do you the level of being accepted by others. SOme others may perceive it wrongly. GUess sometimes... "Acting blur is good"... Even you know, u still have to pretend that you dunoe.....

Short session of KB rehearsal... goin smooth..... in some way or another... effective bah... cuz we didnt us any xtra time to correct any movments... most of it were jz on memory work.... quite cool..... Nothin much else to talk about....

CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Struggling with a bad headache nw... since morning..................

Guess its my fault for sleepin in the evening...... which caused me not able to sleep in the Nite time.... and tada... 4am i am still awake like the owl.... crap!!! Tried means and ways.. but cant get to sleep..... and guess wat.... 8am... bloody hell.. someone sms me... and asked me things.... and tada i am awake... and cant get back to sleep...
Conclusion: WHenever i do not have sufficient sleep, nxt day i would have a bad headache. And if the weather is hot, it will worsen my condition. For example, i feel there are ants inside my head rite now.... Crawling and eating up all my brain cells.... And i am coughin jz nw le.... sign of fallin ill... wth...... losin appetite also.... but then... funni thing.. my weight goes up.... funni loh.......

On the other hand, it was thankful of the class jz nw.... Tink i feel a sense of achievement, esp. for the KB class. For the past few days, i had been busy doin up notes for my exams till i have to panic to tink of routine..... end up i jz whack out 2 new blocks of routine for my HILO/CB classes and 1 Full routine for KB... all within an hour.... its like brain jamming.. but watever lah... somethin jz had to be out......

HILO/CB: Woohooo........... perhaps when things r thought within the shortest time, u tend to get results and in fact greater satisfaction...... managed to do somethin that i had wanted to do... and also the arm movements...... and also, seein the members able to do wat i want them to do...... thats even more happening......... Thanks babes for makin both the SUNDAY morning and MON evening a wonderful one...

KB: Stupid music........ thats my initial remark... guessed somethin is wrong with the mixin of the song... tried the other track and somehow..... its either out of the block..... or there are skipping beats...... swear that i would never use that track again.... either to stick to my usual one.... or use others.... Routine wise..... tried to add abit from the KB demo.... somehow it does work... nt bad.... but nid some fine tuning... i guessed.... adding on, the members of TS is still pretty new to KB... but i could see their efforts.. in fact, most of them had improved since the 1st day..... Didnt have any bonus track today... bcuz some retification nid to be done towards the end... spend 5 mins..... goin through with them the proper way of doin a back kick and the triple side kick..... and thanks goodness that these ladies manage to get what i want... at least they bother to listen...... there r some who jz shut their ears...... hopefully they will remember wat i tell them and show to me at nxt wk....*cross fingers*......

LAstly, kb demo............. did a run-through with bong in the afternoon.. cant believe we only take haf hr........ and managed to finish doin... with some hiccups..... end up i lose lah.... someone managed to do a full solo round without forgettin... but thats only once... till the back....tada.... he keeps forgetting.... wahAHAH... oops... but i am nothin better lah..... cover here n dere..... hope tml would be a better rehearsal... prayin hard that i still able to remember the routine... or else..... i tink i gonna slaughter myself.......

Whats my plan for tml... morning mug mug mug... afternoon 1pm rehearsal... then tink i wun stay long in HQ.... should be goin somewhere to study for my wed morning exams... then EP.... perhaps i would b headin to EP directly.... if nt stay in HQ... see hw things go.... dun like to see so many pple in HQ... too noisy for me to stay dere at times.....

Alrite... enough of stories lah............................. hope tml is a brand new day for me and everyone..... take care all... weather hadnt been gd... students mug hard for exams.... working pple..... stay happy at work.......

*ciao*..........................

I love to study... i luv to read up books... but i hate to sit for exams and be graded.... I knew that exams is the only way to assess ur ability and test whether had you understand what have u learnt over the modules and etc..... But its jz so factual to me.... i hate it.... always have this dreadful feeling whenever it comes to exams...

While others tell me how much they luv school... how much they cant bear to leave school, i am totally on the opposite lah.... i dun like....... HAIX!!!


ANyway... perhaps the fall on last thurs nite had scared or shocked the members away.... kb when i forget the routine and sent the class spinning on their own... and the LO class... caused the impact of this wk........ ahem... but its jz beyond my control lah.....

Had a good session for KB somehow... tink managed to kill them..... i tink so.... i also dunoe... but i enjoyed despite class size was small... cumin to LO.... dunoe lah... distracted here n dere... wasnt really doin what i want to do... PARTLY THE ROUTINE SUX LAH......... my fault..... sorry lah......
promised to come out with better routine for the upcomin one..... in fact, thought of two new blocks while i was bathin jz nw... damn lame....but i hope its a good or rather a better one.....

Able to bring a smile to someone is in fact one of the good things in life.......
Have to... Have to......

13 more days till holidays!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Exams are on the way. Had made myself clear that i wont be changin my routine for this wk regardless which class i am going... SO its somehow like if u see me on mon, thurs, fri or sun... i am still workin on the same routine... so pardon me pls.... exams are somehow more impt than any other things else.... its nt really a form of principle that i have.... but students still ought to know the priority of schooling too...

On top of exams, had been busy with the rehearsal for roadshow... its jz 1 performance show.. but we seem to be doing more than what is required... but i do enjoyed the overall process.. esp. with the 3 of them... Bong, Cheryl and Desiree..... Thanks!! So far things been doin good.....

Will be helping bong to cover his KB class in PM for consecutive 4 wks till nxt mth when he returns... definitely some pple might be disappointed that he wasnt teaching... but apparently there are pple who do not have the smallest heart of giving the chance for the replacement instructor.... They jz disappear and the room looks so different..... but i wun blame them lah....

At least for 1 very clear thing... i know that i have done a relatively good job in doin the class..... at least to me, its a good workout... not by seeing the members panting... more towards that i still get to see the members smiling... as usual.. they dun shout... but its nothing beyond my control.....

This is nt the 1st time i have said this too.... they werent my members... so its natural that they will give u a second look when they see u up on stage..... the kind of doubt.... but when you start to take them for class... the face is more relaxed and u began to see them smiling... guess that is somethin that will ease an instructor like me bah.... at least i know they r trying their best.... so dun tink that they are nt shouting.. meaning that they are not with u.... there is still a level of connection holding btw us... u ought to understand......

Adding on, by treating everyone equally in the class is pretty much wat i have been doing in class.... i cant explain why... but it had nothin to do with fairness or so.... but then i know that i tend to show more concern over the weaker students/ members in the class.... is it a right thing?? I guess different pple have different views and opinions in perhaps...... Could it be because i had been a weak student before.. so i understand the feelings of them???? Perhaps so bah......

Lastly, i feel that all of us have our stand....... be it where do u stand... as long as you have the stability... you are there..........

P.S: Exams are on the way... 15 days more to vacation... Had planned my 3 mths holidays... seem gonna be a fruitful one... i dunoe... we shall see.......

To A: I juz wanna be myself.....
To B: I hope all things are doing good for u
To C: I hope you wont think so much
To D: I hope you are happy
To E: I hope you understand what i feel
To F: I wish you are not xxxxx of me

There is hardly the punctuation called full-stop in my life... Its comma and comma. Bcuz my life is always filled with excitement and emotions.... And the term of full stop means everything had cum to an end.... So we have to move on...... Stop acting like a kid at times!!! Stop whining!!! You gonna grow up!!!!!

Had been real real busy lately.... mostly tied down by projects... guess i am conquering the champion of iron-woman in some ways or another.... beginning to see the true world of an instructor cum a student.... Its not easy i can tell u.....

She gotta juggle between school and work... School is oreadi taking quite abit of her time.. classes... 8 permanent classes.. with replacement classes... jz last mth... she took and attended a total of 87 classes.... which is astonishing........ if she is nt schoolin... i guess the figure is 3 digits.... but so far she is coping well.. i guess.... perhaps for the fact whereby she is getting positive and constructive feedbacks...... somehow... its real true that one's motivation will become ur inspiration... you would be inspired to move further and step and extra step.......

Anyway... why am i blogging... damn simple.. tis clumsy instructor called weishi...had a real bad day on 17th april 2008. Nothing seem to go right.. even from the start of the week... i guess so..... tinkin that her brain was unofficially declared brain dead.. cant tink of new routine..... till today...... at EP.....

Forgot the whole KB routine right from the start of the class... really forget... dun remember wat to do.. and worst thing is mind was in a state of concussion... blank..... and jz do watever she could ever think.. thankfully the baby i'm on fire managed to get the members together... if nt i am in damn shit scenario....... apologies..... but i really tried my best......

CUmin to the LO class....urm urm urm............................ WEISHI HAD A GREAT FALL OFF THE STUPID HIGH STAGE...... till she shocked herself and the members for a few seconds... the stage is like the level of 2-3 staircase height.. in fact, its one of the few highest stage in Amore... and she jz stepped back.. and into the air... and tadaaa............... off she is down off the stage... letting her knees slamming hard against the ground... damn painful....... but thankfully.... no injuries.... other than 2 big blue black on the left knee.... lucky she is still in 1 gd piece.... phew phew.........

but the scenario is still fresh in my mind..... i cant imagine... such a big piece person.... can fall off..... and instructor some more......... so diao.............. be careful in the next time round....

Oh yah..... i jz cleared my last project tis afternoon... nw is like i only goin to begin preparing for my 1st exam paper which is scheduled on next next wk.... less than 14 days... bless me.... wish me.... jiayou lah......